


Coping Mechanism

by SteveDuck



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Recreational Drug Use, Secrets, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-14 19:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29423541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SteveDuck/pseuds/SteveDuck
Summary: Being the Pilot is hard. Sometimes Pilot needs something to keep himself together. Nothing wrong with that, right? Why then is he hiding? Why is he so frightened when Amethyst finds out? Amethyst is his friend, right?
Comments: 4
Kudos: 5





	Coping Mechanism

**Author's Note:**

> This fic takes place just after “Temple of the Paper Gems”. Warnings: Use of cannabis and reference to abuse.

Pilot sat on the temple’s stone hand, behind the washer and dryer, it was the only place he could be away from his new adoptive mother. He also had security from the friends who called the temple their own, if the gems intended to come up there, the low whine of the warp pad would give him plenty of time to hide what he was doing.

He took out a small box and a small piece of paper. Pilot sighed to the night sky before opening the box. The box contained green, dried plant matter. He placed a small amount of it in the paper and rolled it into a cylinder with tapered ends. He took out a blue lighter. “Sorry dad.”

“What you got there?”

Pilot jumped. “Amethyst?” He had already been on edge; the gem’s sudden appearance didn’t help. He scrambled to hide the joint and paraphernalia. “What are you doing here?”

Amethyst rocked back on her heels. “Cool it dude. I saw you from the beach. What is that though?”

“N-Nothing. I d-didn’t hear the warp pad!” Pilot started to hyperventilate.

“I jumped up here Fly Boy. Are you feeling alright?”

Pilot took a couple of deep breaths. He could feel himself fail to calm down. He turned so that his feet dangled over. “Please don’t tell anyone what you saw here.”

“Okay.” Amethyst sat beside him. “But tell me what it is so I can help you.”

“I don’t need help.”

“Then why are you hiding it?”

“Because she’d be ashamed of me!” Pilot looked down towards his ship. “She’d be ashamed.”

Amethyst nodded quietly and sat for a few moments. “Explain.” She demanded. “What is this stuff? And no technobabble.”

Pilot revealed the joint. “It’s called weed.”

“Weed?”

“It’s a plant, you smoke it and it has various effects.” Pilot elaborated.

“Like what?” She asked.

“It helps with anxiety,” he sighed, “and I have a lot of that right now.”

“Ok, do you want to talk about it while you ‘smoke’ that?” Amethyst offered.

Pilot looked down at the cannabis he was holding. “I’ve never really smoked around anyone before. I could calm down by myself and come find you later.”

Amethyst bit her lip as she considered how to phrase her insistence. “I want to know how this works. I want to be here if you need a doctor or something.”

“I won’t.” He smiled. Seeing his friend not budge, he took out his lighter. “Ok then. Here we go.” He lit the joint and took a hit. With a smile, he lay the joint beside him.

“You ok?”

Pilot nodded. “I’ve taken one hit Amethyst, let it settle in.” He took a second hit, waiting a second before letting it go.

“So, what are you so stressed about?” She inquired.

Pilot shook his head. “New family, old family. I mean, Roxillan is my mum! And I’ve been killing her since…” He took another hit. “She’ll come back.”

“Yeah.” Amethyst nodded.

“Whenever I think of my family, I think of him. I can feel his hands on me, on my-” He brought the joint to his lips to calm himself.

“Ulndae?” Amethyst questioned.

“Yep.” His abuser’s name made Pilot take another drag before the first one was fully exhaled. He coughed a bit.

Amethyst realised her mistake as she patted his back. “Sorry! How do you feel now?”

“Good.” Pilot nodded. “There are worse things to smoke.”

“So why would Axi be ashamed of you?”

“The old man, dad, never needed it. He’s strong. When things go wrong he fixes it. He doesn’t resort to marijuana.” Pilot took a long drag before breaking into a fit of giggles. “He doesn’t need this shit to keep together! What the fuck am I doing? I’m nothing compared to him. No wonder I need this.”

“No!” Amethyst held his face. “Needing something to deal with stress doesn’t make you bad.” She considered whether her anecdote would help. “You know when Roxy tried to take Steven and Connie.”

“I smoked so much that night. Like a month’s worth at least.”

“Oh.” Amethyst commented. “Well I ate all the crockery in the house.”

“All of it?” Pilot giggled.

“It was a stressful day!” Amethyst exclaimed.

“Yeah! But what did you eat it off of?”

“The point is,” Amethyst explained, “people have their own ways to cope, so long as you aren’t hurting yourself, its fine.”

“Thanks babe.”

Amethyst raised her eyebrow at the choice of words. “No problem.”

“You won’t tell anyone?”

“So long as you don’t tell Pearl where all the plates went.” Amethyst chuckled.

“Thanks Amethyst, you have a really sparkly gem.”

“Maybe that’s enough for tonight.”


End file.
